Memorial Day is approaching, which means summer travelers will soon be faced with the prospect of trying to choose which airline is less awful: the one that drags customers down the aisle, makes a mom cry, or cancels every flight in a three-day period. Truthfully, though, as Seth Meyers noted while looking back at 40 years of government deregulation of the airline industry, it really doesn't matter, because people will just take whichever flight is the cheapest (and not on Spirit, unless we're really, really desperate).
"Let's be honest," Meyers said. "The main reason airline travel is so awful is that we the customers are okay with it being awful, as long as the ticket prices are low enough. If there was an airline that offered $50 round-trip tickets to any destination in America as long as the pilot could open-hand slap one passenger of his choosing in the face, that airline would never have an empty seat." We'll be sure to alert you the second that some airline cashes in on that amazing marketing opportunity, because you know they will.