Just when I thought this week couldn't get any more traumatic, I logged into Facebook to learn the most tragic news of all: I'm dead now.
Thanks to what appears to be some kind of very morbid bug, many Facebook users are reporting seeing a "Remembering so-and-so" banner on the top of people's profiles, signifying that they've died. The thing is, I'm alive and well. And, as far as I can tell, so are my friends and colleagues whose Facebook profiles are also graced with the memorial message.
Oddly, the bug does not seem to affecting the profiles of people who have actually died in real life. Instead, it's popping up on the profiles of people such as myself who are so alive that we're logged into Facebook and clicking around and doing things a dead person could not possibly do. We've reached out to Facebook for comment and will update this story if we learn anything about this strange Friday afternoon glitch.
In lieu of sending flowers, please follow me on Instagram instead.